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by: ClaireTourney
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Word Count: 364

There is an overwhelming amount of advice available for the broken hearted lover who is desperately hoping to win their ex back. And most of it is excellent, well intentioned advice.

But there is one common thread that runs through almost every effective, tip, method or strategy. It's the concept of self love. The basic thought is this, you can't expect someone else to like you, much less be attracted to you if you do not like yourself.

Now I know low self esteem and lack of self love can be almost endemic. And there are of course myriad reasons for this that could fill up a whole encyclopedia.

But no matter how hard it is to come to a place of really liking yourself, it's the best thing you can work on if you are serious about wanting to get your ex back. Many of the common relationship break up mistakes that people make are because of desperation and neediness, two classic examples of the lack of a healthy self esteem and sense of self.

Now this does not mean that you can't change other things that you perceive will make you more attractive to your ex, but these should be things you would want to change anyway, to be a better you and not just to try and influence someone else's opinion of you.

After all, you have to live with yourself for the rest of your life, whether or not you are in a relationship. So the most important thing you can do right now if you want to get back together with your ex is to not only take a look at where the relationship went wrong, but ask yourself if you are really OK enough with yourself to be in a healthy relationship in the first place.

If you start to work on getting a healthy sense of self love, self acceptance and respect for yourself, this will not only help you to be happier and more confident, but you will become much more attractive to your ex boyfriend, girlfriend, wife or husband too. Then you can start to plan your next move and use some SMARTER strategies to help you get your ex back.

About the Author

Hi, I'm Claire Tourney and I've got some great info on how you can get back your confidence and self esteem, and get your ex back too. Discover a successful, PROVEN plan to win back your lost love by visiting my Squidoo lens Get Your Ex Back!

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