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by: ClaireTourney
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If you have been through a break up and desperately want to get your ex girlfriend back take a step back for a minute and ask yourself why you feel so lost without your ex. Have you been thinking thoughts like:

She was the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm completely useless without her. She is everything to me. No one else even compares to her. I'll never be happy again without her.

Well these thoughts aren't going to help you at all right now and they are not true either. You may not believe it but you can be a happy person again without her, but if you don't understand this you will have a harder time whether or not you do have success in getting your ex girlfriend back.

If you go on thinking that you can't possibly make it without your ex or that you don't want to be alone then you will continue to have problems in this relationship and in any relationship in the future. The truth is you must be OK with yourself first. Not only will you be a happier guy but you will be more attractive to your girlfriend and to women in general.

So if the reasons listed above are the only ones you have for getting your ex girlfriend back you need to think about whether you really do need her or you need to find yourself instead.

You don't want a relationship based on neediness, but rather on love. Although many romantic movie cliches portray romantic love as two people who confess how much they need each other, this is a co-dependent type of relationship instead of a healthy, whole relationship that will last and make you both happy.

So even if you feel more needy than loving right now, take some time and work on yourself and allow real love for your ex to surface. Choosing to love means your are confident enough to give your ex girlfriend some space and it gives you time to reflect before you make your next move.

When you choose to let go of the needy thoughts and feelings and focus instead on the things you love about your ex girlfriend and some of the positive reasons why you want to get back together you will be amazed at how much better you feel about yourself. And this is a much SMARTER way to go about getting your ex girlfriend back!

About the Author

Hi I'm Claire Tourney. Please visit Get Your Ex Back On Squidoo to find out how to be a happier, more confident guy and discover a successful, PROVEN plan for Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back

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