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by: JosephMatthews
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If there was ever a balancing act in our lives, it's the one in which we have to balance our desires, and our beliefs.

As men, we all find ourselves struggling from time to time with our urges and our faith. Here you can gain some perspective of fitting these two together.

It is natural to strive to stand firm in what we believe and for most Christian men, staying within the boundaries of the church is essential for their experience of love.

These boundaries include sex and marriage.

I don't judge this tenant. Some people choose to follow it. I believe this is just as valid as the people who choose not to follow it.

Ancient cultures used to believe that when partaking in sex, a part of the other person's soul would mingle with yours, and that you'd carry that person around with you for the rest of your life.

Keeping your virginity for your wife is a wise choice since this is true in some respects.

Ultimately, this presents a distinctive confrontation for men who wish to remain true to their faith.

There are a few perspectives to consider when you wish to continue attracting women and then foster your relationship while awaiting the consummation of marriage.

After all - sex is important! Getting married to someone who's sexually incompatible with you can be a very difficult union to be in.

Here is some advice I've come up with specifically for men who face this issue of romance vs. faith.

1. Be clear about what you believe.

Keep in mind that things will be easier when you clarify your beliefs, since it is your faith, which guides you through your life.

God gave us free will and the ability to think and reason. It is up to us to look at all our options and decide what path to take. You may believe in some of what the Church teaches, but not all. Or, you may embrace all of the Church's teachings.

No matter what your choice, you must be clear on what it is you believe, and stick to it!

2. Trust in the plan God has for you.

Keep your faith in knowing God has a plan to unite you and the woman who is meant for you.

Since you have free will, you have to take action while striving to take advantage of all opportunities presented to you. Remember, God can only do so much.

To find the right woman for you, you must be proactive.

Going out and meeting women, taking them on dates, getting to know them - this is not just stuff that happens. We have to MAKE it happen. And it is our actions which keep us on the path God has set out for us, because our actions are based on what we believe.

3. Understand that virginity is not mysterious or essential.

Sex is simply an act, whether virginity is in question or not. It comes naturally as does walking, talking and breathing. We do these things.

God meant for man to be fruitful and multiply. We are meant to have sex. It is one of God's greatest gifts. If we were not meant to have sex, He would not have made it pleasurable.

Virginity may be sacred, however, it is meant to be given or lost. Your challenge is to seek out the right person with whom to share your sexuality.

In the end, there is a spiritual aspect to sex. It's the aspect that you find someone who makes you feel whole, alive, and loved. This is something separate from the act of sex, because this touches you on a deeper level.

Striving to achieve this type of closeness before marriage is most helpful in determining whether your physical aspects are in tune with a woman.

Intimacy with women is nothing to be afraid of, hugging, touching and kissing are natural urges and reactions. Nevertheless, true intimacy comes for sharing your hopes and dreams with each other while staring deeply into each others eyes.

4. Women are real people with no need of a pedestal.

When you place too much importance on blending sex and faith, you may find yourself inflating the importance of a woman.

Perhaps you consider her a goddess, a delicate flower, something you should cherish and treat special.

Keep in mind, there isn't much difference in men and women, since we are all cut from the same cloth. Treating a woman special because of a sexual attraction is not the same as respect.

We can easily love an ideal, yet our challenge is to love the reality of a woman. When she is hungry, she may be cranky, she awakens each day with morning breath and she expects you to take out the garbage, this is reality.

We have to learn to love the reality of women, and not idealize them. Realize that sex is just one aspect to the females of our species. And that being human, we all share similar traits.

When we see girls as people, just like us, we are able to get a clearer picture of whether or not we are meant to be with them.

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